Sunday Territorian 31 Jul 2016
Sunday Territorian; NewspaperNT
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Community newspapers -- Northern Territory -- Darwin.; Australian newspapers -- Northern Territory -- Darwin.
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SUNDAY JULY 31 2016 FRONTIER 17 V1 - NTNE01Z01MA ask woody Advice from DAviD WooD to help you muddle your way through the confusing territory that comes with the Territory Dear Woody, I am the father of some badly behaved teenagers and have been looking around for a parenting self-help book. But there are so many out there its confusing. I have been reading about an NT Government parenting book written by some bloke called Don Dale. Do you know about this book or where I might buy it? Dear Loving Father, I like the book because it goes to great lengths to understand troubled teenage boys and gives practical and common sense advice on controlling their behaviour. The corrections minister John Elferink wrote the foreword, so you know its good. Southerners would think tear gas is an extreme way to deal with even the most badly behaved teens, but Don Dale recommends it for pretty much anything you can think of. The genius part is using it before they do anything wrong, making it clear where the boundaries of acceptable behaviour lie; that is, there is no acceptable behaviour. My dad used to tie me with fencing wire into what we called the Paranoia Chair. Hed put a feed bag over my head, then hook it up to the electric fence so I got a regular zap. And wed all enjoy a lovely family night in front of the telly with me in the chair. I couldnt see anything, of course, and I never knew when the next zap was coming, so I had the most horrible panic attacks imaginable. But Im a balanced human being because of it. It also has chapters from well-known dads; the chief minister suggests putting them in holes. Concrete holes. Perhaps thats what the initial hole at Palmerston Hospital was for. I can only resent the success I could have had, had my dad cared enough to throw me in a hole. Highly educated professionals blabber on about respect for our youth. Respect and not shame them? Who are these people? The real answers are squirrelled away in the NT, thought up by blokes with uncommon sense. My dad always liked self-taught men and this is what these blokes are. If we were more violent to our teenagers the world would be a happier place. Put em all in a hole. Does Territory etiquette have you scratching your sweaty noggin? Woody is here to help. Email your questions to email@example.com Follow Woody on Twitter @djwoodeye 2003 The Bougainvillea Festival became Darwin Festival 13.8 The rise in the NTs population between the last two Census counts. The next Census is August 9 LEARN THE LINGO ROUGH JUSTICE The Northern Territory juvenile detention system THE GREAT DIVIDE The distance between Darwin and Palmerston DARWIN CUP Anything used as a vessel to hold beer DARWIN FESTIVAL Any Top End gathering that involves more than three people with more than three beers I enjoy a beer or two at the Hi-Way Inn in Daly Waters. Its a good spot. Im a wheat and cattle farmer on a trip with some mates to celebrate their 50th birthdays, so were in for a good laugh. THE NUMBERS GAME 9 Percentage of mangroves dead or dying in a vast area east of the Roper River. It is unknown why FORGOTTEN TERRITORY Its that time of year the annual Picnic Day holiday. Picnic Day events in the NT date back to the late 1880s. The holiday began as a Union Picnic Day, or Trade Picnic Day, observed at Adelaide River by railway employees working on the North Australia Railway. They were merry affairs, with the railway commonly providing transport from Darwin. In 1936, a train left Darwin at 7am, returning at 11pm. The hotel at Adelaide River recorded record sales and the train was forced to stop often as a number of male Darwin passengers fell off at various points along the line. While the holiday was originally held at different times of the year, in 1981 Picnic Day was gazetted as the first Monday in the month of August. Picture: MARYLYN NICHOLS COLLECTION, NORTHERN TERRITORY LIBRARY